I just wanted to inform my few loyal readers that in addition to poetry I will be starting to write short stories, possibly short plays, and diary style entries on this blog in addition to the poems you all read on here. I hope you will all enjoy these additions. They will be relational to my life directly or indirectly or relate to some aspect of modern society. Looking forward to feedback as I explore more ways to express myself here and plan to post more often.
Thank you all for your support with my writing endeavors.
Rae
Friday, January 28, 2011
Friday, January 14, 2011
My Mother
One day an explosive attack happened to me on the phone.
This one harmed me with its harsh words and screams.
Her selfish statements cut me like a knife to my chest.
I couldn't believe my own mother had said these things.
She was supposed to love my brother and I endlessly,
Yet all she ever thinks about now is herself and her wants.
She used to be our mother and she cared deeply about us.
Now she only talks to us to criticize us and put us down.
She gives "advice" in between the hurtful words she says,
While living a reckless, impulsive life full of terrible choices.
I used to look up to her for working hard at her simple life,
For not abandoning me and my brother as small children.
While our sperm donor father vanished into the dark night,
She stayed and took care of us as our responsible mother.
Now I have mom acting as a teenager with a full time job,
Dating and marrying, then divorcing to marry a man again.
Her emotions unpredictable and often filled with livid rage.
Her concerns dictated by her unpredictable, unstable moods.
I feel mentally abandoned by my mom and can't talk to her,
My life puzzles her and she acts judgemental towards me.
I try to accept her life without judgement over her choices.
Yet I don't get "motherly" love and affection in return.
Others in my life are proud of me and support my actions,
Yet she snubs me, when she matters the most to me.
I feel like she has given up on me and my brother's lives.
She has decided in her mind she is done being my mother.
I have grown up, but I still need my mom for some things.
A mom and dad's job is never completely done in my eyes.
Yet she has moved on and barely talks to me or my brother.
I guess it is time to say goodbye to the mother I thought I had.
I loved her more than anyone else I ever knew on this earth.
I hope the mom who raised my brother and I isn't gone forever.
I loved that mom and I still love my mom. We still need her.
This one harmed me with its harsh words and screams.
Her selfish statements cut me like a knife to my chest.
I couldn't believe my own mother had said these things.
She was supposed to love my brother and I endlessly,
Yet all she ever thinks about now is herself and her wants.
She used to be our mother and she cared deeply about us.
Now she only talks to us to criticize us and put us down.
She gives "advice" in between the hurtful words she says,
While living a reckless, impulsive life full of terrible choices.
I used to look up to her for working hard at her simple life,
For not abandoning me and my brother as small children.
While our sperm donor father vanished into the dark night,
She stayed and took care of us as our responsible mother.
Now I have mom acting as a teenager with a full time job,
Dating and marrying, then divorcing to marry a man again.
Her emotions unpredictable and often filled with livid rage.
Her concerns dictated by her unpredictable, unstable moods.
I feel mentally abandoned by my mom and can't talk to her,
My life puzzles her and she acts judgemental towards me.
I try to accept her life without judgement over her choices.
Yet I don't get "motherly" love and affection in return.
Others in my life are proud of me and support my actions,
Yet she snubs me, when she matters the most to me.
I feel like she has given up on me and my brother's lives.
She has decided in her mind she is done being my mother.
I have grown up, but I still need my mom for some things.
A mom and dad's job is never completely done in my eyes.
Yet she has moved on and barely talks to me or my brother.
I guess it is time to say goodbye to the mother I thought I had.
I loved her more than anyone else I ever knew on this earth.
I hope the mom who raised my brother and I isn't gone forever.
I loved that mom and I still love my mom. We still need her.
Friday, December 17, 2010
My Trip Into Another Life
Down into the darkness from the light I go,
As the painted sunset disappears from the sky.
It's not quite dark yet, but also not quite light.
Somewhere in between is where I dwell now,
Daylight can no longer be chased by me today.
Now the noctural are awaking from their lairs.
I feel unsettled here in the dusky skied forest,
As the creatures of the night start their day.
I wish to escape, but curosity keeps me here.
I see a female creature with skin like snow.
Her lips look like they are painted with blood.
She appears eerily beautiful and dangerous.
I am afraid, yet I cannot get my legs to move,
Too deep in the forest and the snow to leave.
She comes closer and closer to my mortal body.
Swiftly she moves, as if she is a train or a plane;
She is faster than I can ever be on my two feet.
Quickly she comes to a halt right in front of me.
I feel my life in danger in front of this dark girl,
Little did I know that I was about to be reborn.
The transition into my second life was that night.
As she touched my long, thin, unblemished neck,
And she began to sink her teeth into the right side.
She made her distinct mark and took some blood.
No wonder her lips were crimson even in the night,
She was a vampire and she had come to feed tonight.
I soon fainted from the blood loss and she stopped.
Hours, maybe days later I woke up in a strange house,
One that looked like a dark version of the victorian era.
I saw in the mirror that I now had the same pale skin.
I knew I was no longer the same as I was immediately;
My life was changed forever by that one moonlit walk.
I was now like the fair maiden in the night I discovered.
I was a vampire too and for some reason I was chosen,
Rather than just fed on like so many she bit in the night.
Thankful to be alive I started my life with my maker.
As the painted sunset disappears from the sky.
It's not quite dark yet, but also not quite light.
Somewhere in between is where I dwell now,
Daylight can no longer be chased by me today.
Now the noctural are awaking from their lairs.
I feel unsettled here in the dusky skied forest,
As the creatures of the night start their day.
I wish to escape, but curosity keeps me here.
I see a female creature with skin like snow.
Her lips look like they are painted with blood.
She appears eerily beautiful and dangerous.
I am afraid, yet I cannot get my legs to move,
Too deep in the forest and the snow to leave.
She comes closer and closer to my mortal body.
Swiftly she moves, as if she is a train or a plane;
She is faster than I can ever be on my two feet.
Quickly she comes to a halt right in front of me.
I feel my life in danger in front of this dark girl,
Little did I know that I was about to be reborn.
The transition into my second life was that night.
As she touched my long, thin, unblemished neck,
And she began to sink her teeth into the right side.
She made her distinct mark and took some blood.
No wonder her lips were crimson even in the night,
She was a vampire and she had come to feed tonight.
I soon fainted from the blood loss and she stopped.
Hours, maybe days later I woke up in a strange house,
One that looked like a dark version of the victorian era.
I saw in the mirror that I now had the same pale skin.
I knew I was no longer the same as I was immediately;
My life was changed forever by that one moonlit walk.
I was now like the fair maiden in the night I discovered.
I was a vampire too and for some reason I was chosen,
Rather than just fed on like so many she bit in the night.
Thankful to be alive I started my life with my maker.
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