Tuesday, June 29, 2010

A Self Written Truth About Comfort Zones - Another Non-Poetic Post

“Being self imprisoned by your own self-imposed limitations is not a healthy or happy way to live.”

I wrote this quote to some online friends to describe how my own "comfort zones" are limiting what I do rather than making my life better. Living in my own prison causes me to live in fear of ridicule and does not allow me to be myself when around many people.

I think it is time to me to start redefining my level of "comfort" and to break out of my own prison. Going to focus on that over the foreseeable future in my writing here and in my life.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

A non-poetic post

Hello fellow readers! I thought I would take the time now to explain about this blog. Especially now that I know others are reading what I write here.

I write this modern style poetry here in addition to in private to express myself. Since I am a perfectionist, I do heavily edit before posting to ensure good quality posts.

What I write about is based on what I have been through and what I have seen in my lifetime. As someone who is guarded to almost everyone in real life, poetry and this blog is the one place I can express my mind and my innermost feelings. I hope you get to know me better through this blog and I care about everyone here.

Thank you all for following this blog and for reading this blog without discarding me or my feelings. Feel free to comment at anytime in anyway you would like. Writing is my true passion and I hope to be an author one day.

Will be back with new material regularly, thanks for everything.

Monday, June 21, 2010

Zig Zag To My True Self

I go back and forth on my path through life,
Feeling as mixed up as a tossed salad.
I am trying to learn how to always be myself,
Even though what I am is not accepted.

I may be different, but I still need to be loved,
I may not be you, but I am okay as I am.
There is no need for me to constantly question,
Your judgements shouldn't shake me up.

Going back and forth between pleasing others,
And pleasing myself is exhausting me.
I may not be a conventional or "normal" person,
But I am still a good and valid person.

There are parts of me I still have trouble sharing,
Due to fears of rejection and ridicule.
While my friends are able to accept me already,
My family is light years behind them.

In the past, my few, true expressions of myself,
Have been thown away with the trash.
My family laughed at my feelings and my views,
I was expected to be them in my body.

That is why I have been unable to share myself,
With family for the past several years.
My sexuality is sinful to them as are my opinions;
My politics and choices are all "wrong".

Despite all of that, I am sick of playing pretend,
I long to be my self when with my family.
They are supposed to love me more than others,
I am linked to them by blood and DNA.

It is time for me to be myself everywhere I go,
Time to stop being an actress in my life.
I am not playing a part in a play written for me,
I am the director of my unwritten destiny.

Going to change and stop being afraid of them,
Since this is my life to live to the fullest.
I want to live with no regrets and in total honesty,
I am going to live unapologically now.